Do not mess with marriage, the same sex marriage debate
Condensed from a pastoral letter from the catholic bishops of Australia to all Australians
Respect for all
At this time of history, there is much discussion about the meaning of marriage. Some suggest that it is unjustly discriminatory, not to allow people with the same-sex attraction to marry someone of the same sex. Others believe that marriage is an institution uniting a man and a woman. The catholic tradition teaches that every human being is a unique and irreplaceable person, created in the image of God and loved by him. Because of this, every man, woman and child has great dignity and worth which can never be taken away. This includes those who experience same-sex attraction. They must be treated with respect, sensitivity and love
Marriage equality and discrimination
Advocates for same-sex marriage, rarely focus on the meaning and purpose of marriage. Instead, they assume that equal dignity and the principle of non-discrimination demand the legal recognition of same-sex relationships as marriage. This appeal to equality and non-discrimination gets things the wrong way around. Justice requires us to treat people fairly and therefore not to make arbitrary, groundless distinctions. We must treat like cases alike and different cases differently. Only women are admitted to women’s hospitals and only children to primary schools. And if the union of a man and a woman is different from other unions – not the same as other unions – then justice demands that we treat that union accordingly. If marriage is an institution designed to support people of the opposite sex to be faithful to each other and to the children of their union, it is not discrimination to reserve it to them. If we right in this assertion and if the civil law ceases to define marriage as traditionally understood, it will be a serious injustice and undermine that common good for which the civil law exists
Emotional tie versus comprehensive one-flesh union
One view of marriage is that is nothing more than a commitment to love. On this view, marriage is essentially an emotional tie, enhanced by public promises and consensual sexual activity. The marriage is valuable as long as the good emotions last. On this logic marriage could be further redefined to include various types of relationships. There have been examples of “throuples” , that is three people being married in private ceremonies. The traditional view of marriage, which the church has always supported, is different. It sees marriage as about connecting the values and people in our lives; sex and love, male and female, sex and babies, parents and children. On this view, marriage includes an emotional union, but it goes further than that. It involves a substantial bodily and spiritual union of a man and a woman. This union is centred around and ordered not only to the wellbeing of the spouses but also towards the generation and wellbeing of children. On this view what allows for this special kind of union in marriage is precisely their difference and complementarity. Their physical, spiritual, psychological and sexual differences show they are meant for each other. They share the sameness of humanity but enjoy the difference of their masculinity and femininity, being husband and wife, paternity and maternity
The importance of marriage and family, mothers and fathers
The Catholic Church cares deeply about marriage because it is a fundamental good in itself, a foundation of human existence and flourishing, and a blessing from God. Each marriage, from its beginning, is the foundation-in-waiting of a new family and each marriage-based family is a basic cell of society. The Catholic Church believes that God is the author of marriage and has endowed marriage with various benefits and purposes. For these reasons the church can say that marriage is not only a natural institution but also holy. Every child has a biological mother and father. Men and women bring unique gifts to the shared task of raising their children. Mothering and fathering are distinctly different. Only a woman can be mother; only a man can be a father. A mother and father each contributes in a distinct way to the upbringing of a child. There are countless reliable studies that suggest that mothers and fathers enhance – and their absence impede – child development in different ways. Sometimes people claim that children do just fine with two mums or two dads and that there is no difference between households with same-sex parents and heterosexual parents. But sociological research, as well as long experience of church and society attests to the importance for children of having, as far as possible, both a mother and a father. Messing with marriage therefore, is also messing with kids. It is gravely unjust to them. We know that marriages and families are already under very considerable pressure. The church devotes much of her pastoral energy to supporting people to live marital and family life well and to assisting the victims of family breakdown. This convinces us that a further tearing away at the understanding of marriage and family will only hurt more people especially young people who, because of their vulnerability, demand particular care
Time to act
The word marriage isn’t simply a label that can be attached and transferred to different types of relationships as a fashion of the day dictates. It has a natural meaning prior to anything we may invent or the state may legislate. It reflects God’s plan for humanity, our personal growth and that of our children and society. We pray for genuine friendship and love in every person’s life, married or unmarried; for a right understanding of the meaning of marriage and the requirements of justice; and for an increasing openness to the powerful witness of married couples in our world
سامي خنجرو – استراليا
